I have learned a lot in my time here on earth. Sure, I have a lot more to learn, but the early days of learning to ride a bike, conjugate a verb, change a poopy diaper....those days have passed. The things we need to learn as adults are hard. And they suck. We have to learn how to let our kids decide their own fate and find their own way. We have to learn how to say good-bye to a grandparent or beloved friend. We have to learn how to help our children learn how to deal with loss and disappointment.
We also have to learn how to help our friends deal with grief. Today I stood in a hospital room with a friend whose husband is seriously ill, fighting the battle of his life with cancer. As we chatted and laughed about our kids, the room phone rang. Her husband's doctor was calling to tell her that, though her husband made it out of surgery, more cancer was found in him. Being in that room, right in the instant that her very tenuous hold onto hope flew out the door... it was the worst thing ever. Her heart is breaking. Her mind reeling....what to tell the children, how to continue to pray. I have never felt so useless. I didn't know what to say or to do. I am very bad at grief and even worse at knowing the right thing to say. Luckily I was not alone with her and others did and said the best things they could do/say. I know it's not about me, but I want to help. I can't. All I can do is pray, and I'm not very good at that, either. Why isn't there a manual for things like this?
Please help me pray for this family. I wish you all knew them. They are some of the finest people I know. God broke the mold when he created Duane. And Becky is the person I want to be when I grow up (and she's about ten years younger than I am). Go to her blogs and see for yourself. It will make you laugh and it will make you cry. And it will make you hope.....